Your 5 Jokes for March 08, 2012: Television jokes

Dying Her Hair Black

A blonde once walked into a store and pointed to a box on the top of a shelf. She asked the cashier, “Can I buy that TV?" “I’m sorry, we don’t sell anything to blondes," The cashier replied. A week later she walked into the store again but this time, her hair was dyed black. She asked the cashier, “Can I buy that TV from up there?" Again he answered, “We don’t sell anything to blondes." The lady started to get mad and she said, “I don’t understand this! I dyed my hair black so I would be able to buy this TV from you and you’re still telling me that you don’t sell anything to blondes, but my hair is not blond anymore!!" The cashier answered, “Can’t you see its a microwave?"

Soviet Television

A fourth TV channel was launched in the USSR. A Soviet citizen turned on the first channel and saw Brezhnev’s speech being broadcast. He switched to the second channel – the same. The third channel – Brezhnev again. When he switched to the fourth channel, he saw a KGB officer wagging his finger:

“You’ll get in trouble with all this switching!"

Turning The Sound Up

A man and his wife were watching golf on tv and the sound on the commentary was rather low. The woman went to turn it up. 'Ssh,' said the husband, 'ssh. Not while he's putting.'

What Kind Of Job Will You Get ?

"You never get anything right," complained the teacher. "What kind of job do you think you'll get when you leave school?"

"Well I want to be the weather girl on TV."

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

A married couple was watching the show, "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?"

At the end of the show, the man said to his wife, "I think we will have an early night."

She answered, "Okay, but when I get to bed I am going straight to sleep."

And he said, "Is that you final answer?"

She replied, "Yes."

He said, "Okay, then I'm going to phone a friend."

Related collections:

Journalist jokes
Weather jokes


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