Your 5 Jokes for September 12, 2012: Seat Jokes

Airsick

A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window.A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep. The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he's afraid to wake the big guy up to ask if he can go to the bathroom. He knows he can'tclimb over him, and so the little guy is sitting there, looking at the big guy, trying to decide what to do.Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes through the little guy. He can't hold it in any longer and he pukes all over the big guy's chest.About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees thevomit all over him."So," says the little guy, "are you feeling better now?"


Fasten Seat Belts

Flying to Los Angeles from San Francisco the other day, a passenger noticed that the "Fasten Seat Belts" sign was kept lit during the whole journey although the flight was a particularly smooth one.Just before landing, he asked the stewardess about it."Well," she explained, "up front there are 17 University of California girls going to Los Angeles for the weekend."In back, there are 25 Coast Guard enlistees. What would you do?"


Feel Free

Pilot says: "Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land...it's a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern."


Floating Seat

An airline stewardess was giving the standard safety briefing to the passengers. She had just finished saying 'In the event of a water landing, your seat cushion may be used as a flotation device,' when a man remarked, "Hey! If the plane can't fly, why should I believe the seat can float?"


Were You Alright?

Conductor: 'Did you get home all right last night?'

Banta: 'Certainly! Are you insinuating I was drunk?
I was perfectly sober. Did you not see me get up and give that old lady my seat?'

Conductor: 'That's why I wondered, for you two were the only passengers on the bus.'

Search

Keep In Touch