A husband comes home from work. His wife goes for him screaming:
- Why is there a lipstick on your head?!
- It's not a lipstick, honey, it's blood. Somebody hit my head with a stick and then robbed me.
- Lucky idiot!
Settling The Debt
Two women are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money.
They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash.
Just then, the woman turns to the other and hands her a bill.
"Here’s that $20 I owe you," she says.
A gamer walks the street at night. Suddenly round the corner he meets a group of aggressive young people.
"Damn! I should have clicked 'save' button" thought the gamer.
The New Cop
A young man went to work to police. Everything seems to be ok, except for one thing - he never asked for the salary within tree months of work. When the head of the department asked him why, he said:
- Wow! Didn't know you pay a salary here. I thought, you gave me the gun and the rest is up to me.
In a courtroom, a pursesnatcher is on trial and the victim is stating what happened. She says, "Yes, that is him. I saw him clear as day. I'd remember his face anywhere." At which point, the defendant bursts out, "You couldn't see my face, lady. I was wearing a mask!"
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