Your 5 Jokes for September 19, 2013: Luxury Jokes

At The Hotel Lobby

The telephone rings in the posh hotel lobby. The receptionist picks it.

Caller: "Tou ti tou roum tou."

The receptionist answers "Ta ta ta tou tou tou!" and hangs the phone.

The next day she is fired by the manager because the caller was asking her on phone to send 2 tea to room 2!


At The Luxury Restaurant

Lalawa and Milka ate in a posh restaurant ordering all the varieties and dishes. Bill of rupees two thousands was presented.

So immediately Lalawa told Milka, "Pal I forgot my wallet on my desk at home in rush, could you please lend me thousand rupees to pay the bill.

Milka got mad, "Look I thought I would say that first to you. But now, I got these fifty rupees. Take it go to your home in auto-rickshaw and bring your wallet and pay. I'll owe you nine fifty."

Lalawa has not yet reappeared for long and Milka is washing the dishes at the restaurant.


Dresses

A girl walks into a luxury clothing store and asks the salesman:

Girl: What’s the price of this blue dress. It’s very nice.

Salesman: That would be $500 Mam.

Girl: Awww!

Girl: And that pink one how much is that for?

Salesman: Mam that one is for Awww plus Awww!


The Luxury Hotel Height

An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $1000 dollars and were told to use that money to find out exactly how tall a particular luxury hotel was.

All three ran off, extremely keen on how to do this.

The physics student went out, purchased some stopwatches, a number of ball bearings, a calculator, and some friends. He had them all time the drop of ball bearings from the roof, and he then figured out the height from the time it took for the bearings to accelerate from rest until they impacted with the sidewalk.

The math student waited until the sun was going down, then she took out her protractor, plumb line, measuring tape, and scratch pad, measured the length of the shadow, found the angle the buildings roof made from the ground, and used trigonometry to figure out the height of the building.

Of course, with all that was involved in getting this experiment done, they were up plenty late studying for other courses' exams. These two students bumped into the engineering student the next day, who looked quite refreshed. When asked what he did to find the height of the building he replied: "Well, I walked up to the bell hop, gave him 10 bucks, asked him how tall the hotel was, and went inside for supper!"


The Soviet And The Romanian Ministers

The Romanian minister of Transport visits his counterpart in the USSR. He is surprised to see the luxurious house and his rich lifestyle, much more than one would expect for a party member of his rank.

-How do you manage? he asks. The Russian minister takes him to the window and asks:

-Do you see that bridge over there?

-Yes.

-Well, that bridge cost one hundred million roubles. And from such a large sum a little bit comes my way...

A few years later the Russian minister returns the visit. The Romanian minister has an even more lavish lifestyle. The Russian asks:

-How do you manage?

-You see that bridge over there?

-What bridge?

-Well, that bridge too cost one hundred million lei [Romanian currency].