One Of Them
Teacher: What's this a picture of? Class: Don't know, Miss. Teacher: It's a kangaroo. Class: What's a kangaroo, miss? Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of Australia. Smallest boy: Wow, my sister's married one of them.
First Kangaroo: Why did the little girl take hay to bed?
Second Kangaroo: To feed her nightmare.
First Kangaroo: Why did the rabbit go to the doctor?
Second Kangaroo: Because he felt jumpy.
First Kangaroo: What happened to the two bedbugs who fell in love?
Second Kangaroo: They were married in the Spring.
First Kangaroo: Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
Second Kangaroo: He didn't want to jump to a conclusion.
First Kangaroo: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an elephant?
Second Kangaroo: Holes all over Australia.
First Kangaroo: When does a kangaroo jump the highest?
Second Kangaroo: In leap year.
First Kangaroo: What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing?
Second Kangaroo: "Help! My pocket's been picked."
First Kangaroo: What is a kangaroo's favorite season?
Second Kangaroo: Spring.
First Kangaroo: Why would kangaroos make unreliable sailors?
Second Kangaroo: Because they'd always be jumping ship.
Two kangaroos were living in a zoo pen with a 20-foot high fence.
One morning, both kangaroos were found wandering around the zoo, and were quickly put back in their pen, and the fence was put up to 30 feet.
Next morning, they were found outside again, so the fence was made 40 feet high.
The fence got up to 60 feet, and still the kangaroos were outside in the morning.
One kangaroo says to the other, "How high will they make this fence, do you think?"
"Don't know," says the second. "Depends when they discover they're not locking the gate."
The Name “Kangaroo"
Everybody knows about the kangaroo, the tall marsupial that lives in Australia, but when settlers first went there, they were amazed and had never seen anything like them.
They asked an aborigine what the animals were called.
He replied, "Kangaroo," so that is what the settlers called them. Little did they know, kangaroo is an aboriginal phrase meaning, "I don't understand your question."
“Oh, no!" the kangaroo groaned to her friend, the rabbit. “The forecast calls for rain."
“What’s the problem with that?" asked the rabbit. “We could use some rain."
“Sure," the kangaroo said. “But that means my kids will have to play inside all day!"