Your 5 Jokes for March 24, 2014: Heir Jokes

It Helped

Patient: Doctor, I want to thank you for your great medicine.

The doctor was very much pleased.

He asked: Did it really help you?

Patient: It helped me wonderfully.

Doctor: How many bottled did you find it necessary to take?

Patient: I did not take any of it. My uncle took one bottle and I am his sole heir.


Son

I've just read that reggae singer Damian Marley’s son will receive nothing from his father's will.

I can't believe that he's cut off his own Heir.


The Difference

That's the difference between the Prince of Wales, a bald man and a monkey's mother?

The Prince of Wales is heir apparent, a bald man has no hair apparent and a monkey's mother is a hairy parent.


The Testament

Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's Last Will and Testament.

"To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 50 acres of land, and 1 million dollars.

To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the Jaguar.

To my daughter Suzy, I leave my yacht and $250,000.

And to my brother-in-law Jeff, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my sun lamp."


True Heir

Stalin is addressing the people. He announces:
Comrades, I have here a telegram from Trotsky. He states, "You were right and I was wrong. You are the true heir to Lenin. I should apologize."

From the front row a (comrade) tailor rises and calls, "Comrade Stalin!"

Stalin replies, "In our great free socialist state, even a tailor may address the head of state. What is it, Comrade Tailor?"
The tailor replies, "You`re reading it wrong."

"What," says Stalin, "what is wrong? How should I read it? Come up here and tell us."

The tailor reads: "You were right and I was wrong? *YOU* are the true heir to Lenin? *I* should apologize?"