Your 5 Jokes for April 21, 2012: Cook Jokes

Mother’s Cooking

Customer: This food tastes terrible. You told me that the meals here were just like the ones your mother used to make.

Waiter: They are. She couldn't cook either.


The Hair Burger

A guy went into a restaurant and was very hungry. He heard they had good hamburgers. So, he sits down, the waiter comes over and he orders a hamburger, French fries and a coke. After a long wait, the order finally arrives. By this time he is very hungry, but the burger looks great! It is huge and juicy and yummy looking. He takes a bite… and it is wonderful! He chews it down and takes another bite! Suddenly, he feels something in his mouth that isn’t so good… a hair. He pulls it out and is sickened! He calls the waiter over and tells him about his disgusting discovery. The waiter is sorry and says he will bring another burger. Eventually, he does. Same thing happens. The guy asks to see the cook. When he goes back into the kitchen, he notices that the cook is big ole bald guy! He asks the cook to make another burger while he watches. The guy grabs up the meat, forms the burger… and uses his underarm to get that extra little THING!


The Meat Cutting Machine

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.


The Nut In The Soup

A man is sitting in a restaurant eating a thirty-cents bowl of soup.

Suddenly he fishes an iron nut out of the bowl. The indignant customer demands to see the head cook. Out comes the head cook.

'What's this?' asks the man angrily, indicating the nut.

'An iron nut,' replies the head cook.

'Why is there an iron nut in the soup?' fumes the customer.

'What do you expect for thirty cents,' says the head cook, 'a whole tractor?'


Thrown Overboard

A big beer-belly beggar was caught sneaking aboard a sumptuous Princess yacht embarking on a four-day voyage to the Bahamas. He was caught by the chief cook who pancake flipped him right off the ship telling him, “Extra Panhandlers can’t be cruisers".

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