A teacher called upon the classroom to make sentences with words previously chosen.
The teacher smiled when Pete, a slow learner, raised his hand to participate during the challenge of making a sentence with the words Defeat, Defense, Deduct, and Detail.
Pete stood thinking for a while, all eyes focused on him while his classmates awaited his reply. Smiling, he the proudly said, Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail.
A Filipino has just come to the United States and was at the immigration office. The American immigration agent asked him: “Do you speak English?"
The Filipino said: “Yes, Sir."
The agent thought he would have a bit of fun, challenged the Filipino and told him:
- My name is Paul. Use my name four times in a sentence.
Filipino: Paul be carePaul you mightPaul in the swimmingPaul.
One day a man spotted a lamp by the roadside. He picked it up, rubbed it vigorously, and a genie appeared. "I'll grant you your fondest wish," the genie said.
The man thought for a moment, then said, "I want a spectacular job -- a job that no man has ever succeeded at or has ever attempted to do."
"Poof!" said the genie. "You're a housewife."
The Duffer And The Pro
Once the club duffer challenged the local golf pro to a match, with a $100 bet on the side.
"But," said the duffer, "since you're obviously much better than I, to even it up a bit you have to spot me two 'gotchas.'"
The golf pro didn't know what a 'gotcha' was, but he went along with it.
And off they went. Coming back to the 19th hole, the rest of the club members were amazed to see the golf pro paying the duffer $100.
"What happened?" asked one of the members.
"Well, "said the pro. "l was teeing up for the first hole, and as I brought the club down, the jerk hit me with his club on the head while yelling "Gotcha!"
"Ouch!" said the guy "I can see why you lost that hole but how come you lost the game?"
"Have you ever tried to play 18 holes of golf waiting for the second *gotcha*?"
The Turtle And The Hare
One day there was a tortoise walking on the road. Along came the hare that had once been defeated by the tortoise in a race. The hare was so angry from what had happened to him so he challenged him to another race. The tortoise gladly accepted his challenge. It ended up that the tortoise and the hare never finished the race because they both took a nap right before the finish line. So the tortoise is still the champion of the race. So remember this you snooze you loose!