Taking advantage of a balmy day in New York, a priest and three other men of the cloth swapped their clerical garb for polos and khakis and time out on the golf course. After several really horrible shots, their caddy asked,
"You guys wouldn't be priests by any chance?"
"Actually, yes, we are," one cleric replied. "How did you know?"
"Easy," said the caddy, "I've never seen such bad golf and such clean language!"
One day, a Scotsman went playing golf. After standing a while on the green he asked the boy standing beside him: "You are my caddie for today?"
"Yes," answered the boy.
"You are good in finding lost balls?"
"Oh yes, I find every lost ball!"
"Okay, boy, then run and search for one, then we can start!"
On the seventeenth of the Wentworth Club Course a very careful player was studying the green. First he got down on his hands and knees to check out the turf between his ball and the hole. Then he flicked several pieces of grass out of the way and getting up he held up a wet finger to try out the direction of the wind. Then turning to his caddie he asked:
"Was the green mowed this morning?"
"Yes, sir." "Right to left or left to right?"
"Right to left, sir."
The golfer putted... and missed the hole completely. He whirled on the caddie, "What TIME?"
A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club, playing golf, enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack golfer, he plays poorly all day. Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off to the left of the fairway.
He looks at the caddy and says, "I've played so poorly all day; I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake."
The caddy looks back at him and says, "I don't think you could keep your head down that long."
After coming from a long round of golf, his wife kissed him and kissed their son who came in a few moments later.
"Where's he been", the husband asked.
"He's been caddying for you all afternoon", the wife replied
"No wonder he looks so familiar!"