Your 5 Jokes for August 25, 2012: Anger Jokes

Anger or Exasperation?

A young girl who was writing a paper for school came to her father and asked, "Dad, what is the difference between anger and exasperation?"

The father replied, "It is mostly a matter of degree. Let me show you what I mean."
With that the father went to the telephone and dialed a number at random. To the man who answered the phone, he said, "Hello, is Joe there?"

The man answered, "There is no one living here named Joe. Why don't you learn to look up numbers before you dial them?"

"See," said the father to his daughter. "That man was not a bit happy with our call. He was probably very busy with something and we annoyed him. Now watch...."
The father dialed the number again. "Hello, is Joe there?" asked the father.

"Now look herel" came the heated reply. "You just called this number and I told you that there is no Joe here! You've got a lot of nerve calling againl" The receiver slammed down hard.

The father turned to his daughter and said, "You see, that was anger. Now I'11 show you what exasperation means."

He again dialed the same number, and when a violent voice roared, "Hello!" the father calmly said, "Hello, this is Joe. Have there been any calls for me?"

At A Toy Store

After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks, and insane regulations at the department of motor vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son. I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register. "Cash or charge?" the clerk asked. "Cash," I snapped. Then, apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, "I've spent the afternoon at the motor-vehicle bureau." "Shall I giftwrap the bat?" the clerk asked sweetly. "Or are you going back there?"

Losing My Temper

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I keep losing my temper with people.

Doctor: Tell me about your problem.

Patient: I just did, didn't I, you stupid idiot!

Lucky Day

In New York City last week a taxi clipped a red Beetle while veering across four lanes of traffic to pick-up a fare. The two drivers got out to examine the damage the cabbie a short man, the Beetle driver a hulking giant.

As the cabbie approached, the Beetle driver grabbed him by the shirt and hoisted him off the ground. There, at eye level with the cabbie's feet dangling in the air, the Beetle owner began screaming, every third sentence being, "This is your lucky day!"

Eventually, the cabbie was lowered back to terra firma, but, then, the Beetle guy asked, "Don't you want to know why this is your lucky day?" He then proceeded to answer his own question:

"Because I'm on my way to anger management class and I don't dare show-up with blood on my shirt!"

Old Mrs. Kirkland

Worried because they hadn't heard anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver said to her son, "Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Kirkland is?"A few minutes later, Timmy returned."Well," asked Mrs. Silver, "is she all right?""She's fine, except that she's angry at you.""At me?" the woman exclaimed. "Whatever for?""She said 'It's none of your business how old she is,'" snickered Timmy.


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