Your 5 Jokes for March 28, 2012: Street Jokes

A Body On The Sidewalk

A man was walking down the street when he came across a body lying on the sidewalk. He ran to a phone and called 911.

The operator asked him where he was and the man replied, “I’m on Sycamore Drive.”

“How do you spell that?” the operator asked.

“S-i-c-k…” the man began. “No, s-i-c-a…..” no, s-i-k-a…. oh heck, let me drag him over to Lake street and I’ll call you back.”

Related jokes: Spelling jokes


On A One-Way Street

A policeman pulled a blonde over after she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street.

Cop: Do you know where you were going?

Blonde: No, but wherever it is, it must be bad, cause all the people were leaving!

Related jokes: Driving jokes


The Dog In The Fire Truck

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog.

The children fell to discussing the dog’s duties.

“They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster.

“No,” said another, “he’s just for good luck.”

Then a third child brought the argument to a close…

“They use the dog,” she said firmly, “to find the fire hydrant.”

Related jokes: Firemen jokes


The Spinach Gravy

Three friends were walking on the road. One fellow stopped the other two. “Hey stop stop...”

The other two asked: “Why did you stopped me?” The first guy replied: “You were about to stamp on a spinach gravy”.

“Spinach Gravy!”, the other two asked in loud. “Yeah. Who poured it here?”. All were blinking.

First fellow said: “Let’s taste this it!” The other two nodded: “Yep, yep”.

The first fellow touched the green thing and said: “Oh, no! This is amazing, I couldn't find”.

The second fellow took a sample and smelled: “Alas! I dono what this is!”

The third person said: “You are fools, how come you know a thing by touching and smelling it?” I'll find this”, he boasted and took a sample and tasted it and yelled with joy:

"OH MY, THIS IS COW SH*T, HEAVEN SAKE WE HAVE NOT STAMPED ON IT" and all the three crossed over it with pride.”

Related jokes: Vegetable jokes


The Voice

A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him.

The man was astonished.He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, and a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.

"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.

"Oh yeah?" the man asked. "And where the heck were you when I got married?"

Related jokes: Marriage jokes