Your 5 Jokes for December 25, 2012: Night Jokes

Back From A Party

Lionel and Judith had just returned home from a party.

Judith said, “Do you realise what you did tonight, Lionel?”

“No I don’t,” Lionel replied, “but I'll admit I was wrong. What did I do?”


Happiness

Sam and his wife Sarah are lying in bed one night when Sam sidles over to her side of the bed and whispers in her ear, "I'm going to make you the happiest woman in the world."

Sarah says, "I'll miss you."


Sleep

Sam: “I haven’t slept for three days!”

Peter: “Wow! Then you must be very tired!”

Sam: “No, I sleep at nights.


The Robber

A man was sleeping soundly when his wife shook him and said, “Wake up, someone is breaking in!”

The man had gone through this same scenario almost every night of his marriage, and he knew that the only way he would get any rest was to get up and go check it out.

This time, however, he found that there really was a man with a gun who entered to rob the house!

As the thief was about to flee the man said, “Stop! You have to come with me and meet my wife.”

Surprised, the thief turned around abruptly and said, “Why would you want ME to meet your wife?”

The man replied, “She’s been expecting you for 20 years.”


The Sun

Sidney, a scientist, wanted to know where the sun went after it set. He went around asking the other scientists, but they didn't know either. Pretty soon he had the whole of his science department trying to figure it out. They puzzled over it for a long time but they couldn't come up with an answer. In fact they sat up all night thinking about it until finally it dawned on them.