Did You See That?
Two guys are out hiking. The first guy says, "Did you see that?"
"No," the second guy says.
"Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy says.
"Oh," says the second guy.
A couple of minutes later, The first guy says, "Did you see that?"
"See what?" the second guy asks.
"Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there."
A few minutes later the first guy says: "Did you see that?"
By now, the second guy is getting aggravated, so he says, "Yes, I did!"
And the first guy says: "Then why did you step in it?"
Fishing In The Privy
A hiker is walkng up to the shelter when he sees another hiker with a rod and reel fishing in the privy. He walks over and asks " what in the world are you doing in there"? He says "I dropped my jacket in and I'm tryin to get it out".
The first hiker looks in at the jacket and says "You're not actually gonna wear that are you"? The second hiker shakes his head in disbelief at such a ridicules question and replies "Heck No! There is a Snickers in the pocket"!
George And Dragon Inn
A couple of hikers were tramping through the countryside and had lost their way, so by the time they arrived at the "George and Dragon", the village inn where they'd arranged to stay the night, the doors were locked and the owners had gone to bed. They knocked timidly on the front door.
A head appeared at an upstairs window and shouted, 'Go away. Don't you know what time it is? We're closed,' and the the window slammed shut.
Undeterred, the hikers knocked again. 'What is it now?' demanded the head.
'Could we speak to George this time please?' asked on the the hikers.
The Best Guide In The US
A group of hikers were being led through the wilderness by a guide. On the third day, the hikers noticed that they had been traveling in circles.
"We’re lost!" One of the hikers complained.
"And you said you were the best guide in the United States."
"I am," the guide answered, " but I think we may have wandered into Canada."
The Difference Between a Crow and a Raven
During a hike with my friend, I noticed a black bird roosting in a nearby tree. "I've always wondered what the difference is between a crow and a raven," I said.
"You have to count the pinion feathers on the wings," my friend explained. "If there are four, it's a crow. If it's five, it's a raven."
"Really?" I said, although I knew he didn't have a clue what he was talking about.
"Oh yes," he replied. "The difference is just a matter of a pinion."