While working at an auto mechanic shop, we had a co-worker that was on waiting list for a heart transplant. One day the phone rang and the girl up front answered. It was the hospital with good news. “Sam," she yelled. “Your parts are in!"
"Excuse me," he said, "have you lost something?"
"No," replied one of the doctors. "We're doing a heart transplant for an income-tax inspector and want to find a suitable stone."
One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a "massive internal fart."
Josh phoned his heart surgeon to schedule an appointment for an immediate surgery."I’m sorry," the receptionist answered, “we don’t have anything available for the next three weeks.""But I could die by then!""No problem, just call before to cancel the appointment."
The Lawyer’s Heart
An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed his options with his doctor.
The doctor said, “We have three possible donors; tell me which one you want to use. One is a young, healthy athlete who died in an automobile accident. The second is a middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and who died in his private plane. The third is an attorney who just died after practicing law for 30 years."
“I’ll take the lawyer’s heart," said the patient.
After a successful transplant, the doctor asked the patient why he had chosen the donor he did.
“It was easy," the patient replied. “I wanted a heart that hadn’t been used."