5 Desert Jokes

A Californian In The Desert

There is a California dude going through a desert. He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman. He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully: "Hey dudes how far is the sea?" They look at each other and say: "Two thousand miles!" And he says: "Wow what a cool beach!!!"


Crossing the Sahara Desert

There once was a "smart guy," a "not that smart guy," and an all round "not smart at all guy." They were going to cross the Sahara Desert. The "smart guy" says, "meet here in an hour with something useful to cross the desert with!" Later on an hour passes. The "smart guy" says I brought some ice packs to keep our heads cool, the "not so smart guy" says I brought a pail of water to keep us hydrated. The "not smart at all guy" says, "I brought a car door so I can roll the window down when it gets hot!"


Survival In The Desert

A Scout Master was teaching his boy scouts about survival in the desert. "What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost in the desert?" he asked. Several hands went up, and many important things were suggested such as food, matches, etc.

Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand. "Yes Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring with you?" asked the Scout Master. Timmy replied: "A compass, a canteen of water, and a deck of cards."

"Why's that Timmy?"

"Well," answered Timmy, "the compass is to find the right direction, the water is to prevent dehydration..."

"And what about the deck of cards?" asked the Scout Master impatiently. "Well, Sir, as soon as you start playing Solitaire, someone is bound to come up behind you and say, "Put that red nine on top of that black ten!"


Ties In The Desert

A man on a camel rode through miles of the sun-drenched desert searching
for some sign of life. His supplies were running low when his camel died.

Now on foot, he desperately sought refuge from the heat, and, most importantly,
a source for water.

Suddenly, he came across a vendor in the middle of the desert.

"Thank God I found you!" the man cried. "Please help me. I'm in dire need of some
water."

"Well," said the vendor, "I don't have any water. But would you like to buy one of
these fine ties."

"What am I going to do with a tie?" the man asked.

"That's what I'm selling sir. If you don't like it, I can't help you."

The man left the vendor and walked on for many more miles, praying each minute that
he would find refuge from the scorching sun.

His eyes squinted a bunch of times when he came across a restaurant in the distance.
Unable to comprehend a restaurant located in the middle of the desert, he assumed the
place was a mirage, but decided to check it out anyway.

As he approached the door, his mouth opened in amazement, seeing that the place actually
existed.

The doorman stopped him before he entered.

"Excuse me sir," the doorman said, "But you can't come in here without a tie!"


The Desert Guide

We hired a tour guide to give us a tour of the deserts in Arizona. After we stopped for dinner, we realized we were really lost. “I thought you said you know Arizona deserts in your sleep!" we yelled at the guide. “I do!" he replied. “But I think we are in Mexico now!!!"

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