Your 5 Jokes for May 29, 2012: Bookshop Jokes

Dating book

A guy walks into a bookstore. Not looking for anything in particular. On his way to the back of the store, he spots something of interest.

A book, with a very interesting title, "Dating for the New Millennium. What Women Want." So he picks it up and opens it to a random page.

"Chapter 1 The First Date."

So, he glances the chapter over for a few minutes, and rushes out of the bookstore to call a friend whom he's wanted to ask out for quite a while. When he gets home, picks up the phone and calls her.

She answers, "Hello?"

He says, "Hi, Mona? It's me. Listen, I was wondering if you would want to go see a movie with me tonight?"

She says, "Sure, I don't see anything wrong with that."

He gets excited. He thought she'd say, "No Way!" but she didn't. So, he decided to take it one step further.

He asks, "Great, well how about dinner before the movie?"

She replies, "Sure, that would be great too!"

"Fine, I'll pick you up about 9, you should have finished eating by then!"


Fiction

A woman walks into a bookshop and says to the young man cleaning the floor

“I want fiction".

He replies “This isn’t really a bookshop. It’s a space ship from the planet Zarg and an evil alien that looks almost human is about to abduct you."

Just then the manager approaches and says “Can I help you madam?".


The Philosophy Section

A woman walks into a bookshop and starts browsing books in the Philosophy section.

After a while the assistant comes up to her and says “Can I help you madam?"

The woman replies “What do you mean by ‘Can I help you madam’?"


War and Peace

A woman walks into a bookshop and says to the assistant at the counter “Where would I find ‘War and Peace’?".

The assistant replies “The military section is just over there and beyond that you’ll find Cookery and Gardening where there’s bound to be something on peas."


West England

England’s West Country is known for its charming cottage-like shops. While visiting the area, my friend peered in through one window to see shelf upon shelf of interesting-looking books. So she went inside.

A woman appeared through a beaded curtain and asked, “Can I help you?"

“No, just browsing," said my friend.

“Fine," came the reply. “But so you know, around here most people knock before entering someone’s home."

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