Are You Comfortable?
One day, Mark is crossing the street and gets knocked down by a car. Although only slightly hurt, an ambulance is called. When it arrives, the attendant puts a blanket over Mark and a pillow under his head and asks, "Sir, are you comfortable?"
Mark looks up and says, "Well, I make a living!"
Running Behind The Ambulance
There was an ambulance with its siren on that was rushing to the hospital that passed by a tenement. After they passed the tenement, they saw a man running quickly to the ambulance. The drivers were questioned by his presence behind them so they stopped the ambulance and asked the man what was his problem. The man ran up to the ambulance and asked, "Eh, U still get ice cream?"
A call was answered at a 911 emergency center..
"Please, send an ambulance, my mother-in-law has eaten poisonous mushrooms," a male caller said.
The ambulance came, and the paramedics examined the victim.
"Why does she have a bump on her head and bruises and scratches all over?," one of the paramedics asked.
"She didn't want to eat the mushrooms," the son-in-law answered.
I had quite an experience today. I was in the mall parking lot and there was this woman getting in her car. She was about to close the door when this other woman tried to park beside her and hit her car, slamming the door on her foot. I ran over to see what I could do to help. The door had completely severed the woman’s big toe off. I tried to stop the bleeding as much as I could, then ran to the phone and called an ambulance. The ambulance arrived and as the paramedics were stuffing her into the ambulance I asked one of the paramedics "Aren't you going to take her toe along so the doctor can sew it back on?!". "Nope",said the paramedic, "you got to call a toe truck for that."
Two lawyers met at a cocktail party late one night.
'How’s business?' asked the first.
'Rotten,' replied the other. 'Yesterday, I chased an ambulance for twenty miles. When I finally caught up to it, there were already two other lawyers hanging on to the bumper.'