5 Robbery Jokes

Blonde Robbery

A red-head, a brunette and a blonde perform a Post Office robbery. They are on the run from the police and they have to ditch their car and go cross country.

They are all getting tired and happen across an old farm with a huge barn. Sneaking inside the barn, they see three old flour sacks. They all hide in separate sacks.

The police enter the barn and upon seeing the sacks, kick the first one containing the redhead. The redhead says "Woof!".

"Nothing in here but a dog, sarge" says the constable. "We'd better move on".

They kick the sack containing the brunette. "Miaow!" she says.

"Nothing in here but a cat, sarge. Better move on".

They kick the sack containing the blonde and the blonde says "Potatoes!"


All The Exits

During a bank robbery the police chief told the sergeant to cover all exits so the robbers could not get away.

Later the sergeant reports to the chief. "Sorry Sir, but they got away."

The chief very angry says, "I told you to cover all of the exits!"

"I did," replied the sergeant, "but they got away through the entrance."


Blonde Thief

A blonde walked up to a man and said, “Give me your wallet.” The man said, “Okay, but give me the gun.”The blonde gave him the gun and the man gave his wallet. The man used the gun to steal his wallet back. The blonde said, “You’re an idiot — there’s no bullets in the gun.” The man replied, “You’re the idiot — there’s no money in the wallet.”


Robbery At The Lawyers Club

A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer’s club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money.

The gang was very happy to escape. “It ain’t so bad,” one crook noted. “We got $25 between us.”

The boss screamed: “I warned you to stay clear of lawyers … we had $100 when we broke in!”


Three Times Robbery

An FBI agent is interviewing a bank teller after the same bandit had robbed the bank 3 times successively.

"Did you notice anything special about the man? I mean, did he ever change his appearance?" asks the agent.

"Yes," replies the teller. "He was better dressed each time."


Related Collections

Arrest jokes - Attorney jokes - Court jokes - Crime jokes - Defendant jokes - Escape jokes - Jail jokes - Judge jokes - Jury jokes - Justice jokes - Law jokes - Lawyer jokes - Mugging jokes - Murder jokes - Police jokes - Prison jokes - Prisoner jokes - Robber jokes - Theft jokes - Thief jokes - Trial jokes - Witness jokes